Today is a good day. I am happy to say I am feeling really good in a kinda relaxed familiar way. I have been very busy to say the least. I think I may have been over compensating for what I perceived as lost time during the active phase of my illness. I felt kind of “out of control” wanting to get back to “normal” and do all the things I hadn’t been doing for the last 8 months. I have a bad habit of forcing things, making stuff happen! But sometimes, as I am learning, you just have to let things run their course. So in the last few weeks I have been going like crazy, doing this and that. Go, go, go! The puppy keeps me busy, in, out, in, out, play, play, play!  Jerry left for Puerto Rico, so everything is my responsibility, yikes! I have started painting again, with many more cool projects piling up. I have been yard saleing. I have been playing my cello, even jammed with some friends! I have been cleaning and organizing my house and getting back into doing some much needed yard work. It has been crazy steamy hot here, of course it is summertime in Florida! I have been walking and doing Tai Chi. Promoting my artwork again. I have been eating healthy and taking care of myself. Researching all kinds of stuff. Back to doing farm chores and horses. Wow!

Don’t get me wrong I am thoroughly enjoying myself! I oftentimes look back and think I couldn’t have done this six months ago. Just walking to the barn was all I could muster! I am beginning to recognize myself again. I feel more like the old familiar me! My strength is coming back, my hair is coming back, I think it’s actually thicker than it was before! I now have eyebrows and lashes! I have researched, got approval from my doctor, and have started taking a supplement called Turkey Tail Mushroom. It has had some very promising results in supporting the immune system in post chemo patients. I am still dealing with some side effects like this crazy burning in my thighs if I stand up for too long and hot flashes and night sweats from the hormone therapy. Bone and muscle aches and pains, some mornings I’m not sure if I can get out of bed! But these things are getting better and I can live with them.  And I am finding that the better I take care of myself, eating clean and gentle exercise, the better I feel, mentally and physically, surprise!

So now I am beginning to feel like I can calm down, rope myself in a little bit and find some balance. Work, play, RELAX, repeat!



IMG_2129I must say today I am grateful for hair. It’s a funny thing how people just don’t appreciate what they have until it is gone. So funny, I never really thought about my hair that much before. I never spent a whole lot of time primping and curling or straightening and perming. I pretty much kept it kinda short so I could wash it, put some product in and go! When it went away, I found myself looking a lot at peoples hair. I would notice things like all the nurses in the infusion center had gobs and gobs of hair. I mean lots. Weaves and wigs or whatever! But they all seemed to have a whole lotta hair! Maybe because they worked with hair challenged people all day they really went above and beyond with their own!

My hair is really starting to come back in now and it is so cool. The color looks just like my puppies coat, so right now I am sporting the Griff look! Down the road I may try some  color, blue or purple or maybe both! It is still really short but oh so thick and luxurious! Lol! It’s kinda like a new toy running my fingers through it, is so much fun! I was really surprised how much hair regulates your temperature. It really does help keep you warmer in cool weather and, I believe, cooler in warm weather. It is kinda cool seeing the changes and transformations it is going through. I’m just leaving it alone and seeing what its gonna do right now. Someone even gave me a compliment on my hair yesterday! One of the hardest things for me through my treatment was losing my eyelashes and brows. That was just weird and hard to pull off. But thanks to Wink, my eyelashes are coming back thicker and darker than before. My eyebrows are looking great, almost totally back! Thank you, Wink! I absolutely love this product and this company!

ALL my hair is coming back! Hair I didn’t even realize I lost, nose hair, arm hair. Its all coming back! I did enjoy the nice break from shaving my legs and arm pits but I’m not gonna complain! I was actually threatening to never shave again and just embrace ALL my hair! But on second thought, I just don’t think the Grizzly Adams look would work for me. It feels really good to be getting  back to normal even if that means shaving every night. It sure is nice to start recognizing the person in the mirror! Looking more like myself makes me feel more like myself and that makes me happy. Summer fun here I come!